Protecting my Energy

I am very protective of my energy around other people. I don't always know how to protect it from them, though. That's one of the reasons I practice yoga. It makes me aware of energetic shifts.

It was very difficult for me to raise children and be married when I was unaware that such a thing as "protecting my energy" even existed. When I'm not careful, my energy will demand for other people to heal when they are near me. It can be very overwhelming for both me and the other person.

Luckily for me, I married a man who is also self-driven to heal and continually be a better version of himself. Had he not matched my energy, then I think we might have pushed each other away.

I'm a maternal person and naturally pour my love into people. Love can be synonymous with healing. When I had kids, I realized that they drained me. Everything I had was being poured into them and I didn't know how to draw energy from myself. It was an exhausting and turbulent time in my life to care for my littles and my husband but to feel that I couldn't get enough energy to care for me.

Luckily, I started learning yoga asanas and working with my koshas to be my own source of energy and my own source of calming. That led to finding even more resources to help me.

When I went from living in my private and controlled world of being a stay-at-home-mom and started working in the public school system, with thousands of people around it, it was a shock to my system. I was trying to balance relationships and maintain my own peace.

I thought it might be a good idea to eat lunch with coworkers, but then I realized that it was too exhausting for me. I could not give to my students and my family and spend my lunch times talking with other people. I needed a sanctuary during the middle of the day to release energy that didn't belong to me and reset myself.

My minivan proved to be a wonderful place for me to spend my lunch time. I rolled down my windows, reclined my backseat, set my alarm, and sat upside-down in the van. I sat upside-down by laying my head on a blanket against the footrest and my legs across the back of the seat in a legs-up-the-wall pose, which is calming to me.

I visualized cutting connections with people and sending their own energy back to them and keeping my energy with me. Then I visualized connecting with God and running my own energy throughout my whole body. Sometimes my body would even go into the relaxation response, and I would take a quick cat nap. After separating from all those other energies, I could return to my day with more balanced emotions.