Shut My Mouth

Oh, thank God I have reached the point in my life where I keep my mouth shut more often than not! Not everyone is able to see this small victory of mine, but I know when I do it, and that's encouraging. As usual with me, I notice these things when I'm dealing with my children.

Similarly to how children can be on their best behavior all day long, when they aren't with their families, and then become grumpy once they get with their parents, I'm finding that I have to avoid being grumpy when I finally get to come home from student teaching and I'm with my children. Since I have begun teaching at a middle school, I've caught myself nearly snapping at my children simply because they are too close to me.

This past weekend, as with the past several weekends, I've been mostly secluded in my upstairs office. I came downstairs for a little bit, on Sunday, and took the kids to a bookstore to buy some new books they had their eyes on. They were so happy, and by the time we were at the check-out line, they were basically clinging to me, and tip-toeing to see over the counter as I decided which books I was going to purchase or send back to purchase on another shopping trip.

I almost snapped at them to get off me. But I didn't. I've worked to get into the habit of thinking--just a little bit--before speaking. I quickly realized that they were clinging to me, because it's been so long since we've snuggled as they have been accustomed to doing, and that it was just an expression of how happy they were. Rather than snap at them, as I went to pick my arm up and push them away, I caught myself in the act, and turned that movement into a hug. A hug which my children sincerely returned. I focused on telling my muscles to relax during it. Then, when I noticed that my children were still preventing me from checking out, I just handed my son the card to swipe, and that distracted him quite nicely.

Thank God that I shut my mouth and just hugged them despite the anxiety within me. They were so happy to be with me, and getting books, and I just know that if I had snapped, it would have squelched all of their joy.